Fear, of course, is the greatest enemy we face in most rough spots in our lives. And with cancer I have found fear of the unknown is the most prevalent, but has proven to be the easiest to deal with.

So it's late February here in Western PA and typically gray and blustery. I am on my way home on about an hour commute. I notice that I am feeling a dull but constant pain in the back of my left shoulder and a little numbness in my left forearm. With the exception of some infrequent sinus congestions/head colds, I tend to have been pretty healthy over my fifty two years. Last summer I had thought that I could lose some weight as 226 was a little soft and flabby for my 5 foot 11 frame.

That turned out to be a pretty easy task and I was pleasantly surprised. It was all about my diet and just a slight adjustment at that. My job as a field service technician for a photofinishing equipment manufacturer has me in my car 10-12 hours. I did not know how to eat if it wasn't out of styrofoam from the dollar menu, steering with my knees, talking on my cellphone, on the way to the next call. (Actually that behavior would be strictly against Company policy, but I have seen it on the highway)

I made the simple lifestyle change of avoiding the fast food drive in window at all costs. Double cheeseburgers from Mickey D's were replaced with turkey wraps with all the veggies and none of the dressings. No salt, thank you very much. Deep Fried anything? I'll pass. Coke? How about a water or some OJ.

I never got on a scale over the next few months but that 38" waistband was showing the changes pretty well. About two months into my little effort I finally check my weight. I had gone from 226 down to just about 200 even. Wow! That WAS pretty easy....

But something about this pain in my shoulder was different. Wasn't this the classic sign of a heart attack? But this has been going on for an hour or more...should I not have gotten worse, or WORSE???

I had to get a new Primary Care Physician as my previous three over the past five years or so had either moved, retired, or quit medicine completely. I found a good ole fashion family doctor in a nearby town that was the fourth generation in his "Family" practice. I was able to get in to see him on his "Wild, Wacky, Walk in Wednesdays".

Called into his office, he looked up from behind his desk as I walked in and said, "I want you to take a low dose aspirin everyday...it'll keep you from having a stroke or heart attack."

I replied "Hi Doctor, my name is Mark.....do I look that bad?"

He laughed and said "No, but you are a married, working white male over the age of 50...you haven't got a chance..."

He took my BP and it was about 150/95, about 30 pts higher than normal... He checked my shoulder and said that it felt like I may have some arthritis in my shoulder and it felt somewhat loose. As far as the potential heart issue he said that he would take some blood and check the numbers but he wanted me to cut back on coffee and try to lessen the cigarettes. He prescribed an anti-inflammatory and asked me to come back in two weeks.

My return found my BP back down to around 125/78. All of my bloodwork was good with low cholesterol, no bad prostate numbers, no diabetes threat....all those delightful things men over 50 should watch.

He first took some xrays of my neck and shoulder. Checking them out he noticed that some congenital issues with some vertebrate in my neck (badly formed as I was about a two months premmie)and it looked like I had a bone spur that may be contacting the nerve (Ulnar????)passing through my left shoulder and down my left arm...which was having numbness off and on.

His manipulations and electrical stimulations helped a bit but only lasted about an hour. But now I was armed with xrays, so back I went to my family doctor. By now it's the first week in June.

Dr. W looked the xrays over and asked me if I had insurance, (he is known to take eggs as payment---a practice not really offered by my local hospital---Refreshingly, he gets it....), and I said yes. He told me he was going to schedule an MRI to "see what's going on in there."

About a week or so later I went into my local hospital for an MRI. Not knowing what to expect I was a little nervous as I had heard that claustraphobia could be an issue. It turned out to not be an issue as I just laid there, listened to some music on headphones and it was done in 20 minutes. That wasn't all that bad. So off to work I go.

Around 3:30pm I got a call on my cell phone from Dr. W's office. His nurse wanted to know if I could stop in today to talk over the MRI result. I told her that I was about a hundred miles away and could not make it. She said that Dr. W was leaving the next day for about a week, so I should hold on.

Dr. W got on the phone. "Mark? I really don't like talking about these things over the phone, but I'll be leaving for a week. It looks like you have a tumor in the top of your left lung. Where the tumor is located it looks like it may be pressing on the nerve. I want to schedule you for a CT scan that will show more detail."

My ability to comprehend anything he was saying ended at the word tumor.

This was one of those lfe moments when you know that everything has changed in a blink of an eye. The 3am phone call from the Minnessota Police to tell my wife her 32 yr old brother was killed in a car accident. The Saturday night that the nusre called me on the cellphone to tell me that she had just checked in on my 83 year old Alzheimer inflicted mother in her assisted living room to find that she had died.

Time just stops. I could not believe that I was actually hearing these words being spoken to ME. The hundreds and thousands of times I was warned about smoking.....my having to pick up my dead Fathers body from his bedroom floor at 3am some 12 years ago after he finally lost his battle with skin/stomach cancer...my first wife's father dying in 1979 of liver cancer right before my eyes in an Albany hospital...my wife OH MY GOD, my wife Kim!!!

Dr. W went on about how there is a chance that it doesn't have to be malignant and how the CT scan and a biopsy will tell the tale...He said that his nurse would schedule the CT scan for next week...that way "we could get together and review the results when I get back in two weeks."

"Two weeks!!!!!" was the first thing I could get out of my mouth. "Easy Mark, we have time here, this is very early on..."

I hung up and just stood outside the Giant Eagle supermarket that was my call that day. I had forgoten what was wrong with their photo lab that I was there to fix. I even forgot where I was for a moment. All I really knew is I had to call my wife Kim. "She can make this better somehow...I just have to be gentle in telling her....God how I love her....."

Her cell was ringing, then it answered.

"Hi Kimmy, where are you?" I asked. Can she hear something in my voice I wondered? "I'm home, I just got back from Ohio....what's wrong?"

Welp, that answered that question...

"Dr. W called me with the MRI results from this morning and he says I have a lung tumor" Don't pussy foot around with something this serious I figured...

About a ten second pause then she came back with "Is it cancer?" I told her that they did not know and the Dr. wanted to do a CT scan and a biopsy. "When will they do that?" she asked. I said that the Dr. said he wanted me to go to Butler's hospital the next week. Kim said "No way you are going to Butler hospital, I'm gonna find the best cancer people at UPMC (Universty of Pittsburgh Medical Center). Can you come home now?" she asked with just a tremble in her voice. I said yes, I just had to call my boss.

"Mark", Kim said, "we're gonna get through this."

I kinda chuckled inside as I realized that Kim had just did indeed "make it better".

I laughed and said, "Hey Kim....." "What?" she responded.

"What goes easy for us?" I asked.

"Nothing" she responded instantly...."Please come home, I love you so much..." "I love you too, Kim. I'll be home in about two hours". She had just recounted our pat response we had for each other when faced with adversity. Everything from the builder of our first home running away with our life's savings downpayment down to the KFC Drive Thru "Suggestion Board" was again exerting it's influnce to make an 8 pc. meal a 7 pc. meal for the 1.213th time....Our entire life together over thse past 19 years had been spent witnessing everyone around us pass hurdles and bumps in the road with amazing ease and convenience. With us it was always going to be extra effort, scarifice, and a good dose of general pain in the ass.

I could breathe a little better now. My hands were not trembling. thank God I had Kim.

Kim had managed to make me an appointment with the Cancer Center at Passavant for mid July. Mid July????
Everything about this cancer deal is turning out to be a bit different than I thought. No one had yet determined that I even had cancer, but what happened to the old "Early detection" slogan? Oh well...

The last week of June had me going to my little Ellwood City Hospital one last time for the CT scan. This was another step into medical science I had no experience with. I arrived early and was number two in line for my "upper chest/neck with contrast" scan, whatever that meant.

What that meant was I was going to have to be hooked up to an electronically operated IV machine that looked ever so suspiciously similar the set up used in death chambers at your favorite local Federal Penitentary. Did I mention that I absolutely despised injections and needles in general and although I realized it to be an unreasonable and irrational fear, it was MY fear and I had every intention of keeping it that way! My nurse was very good at putting in the th IV needle, as those things go, but I was still scared and it still pinched and I still did not like it.

The "contrast" they had mentioned was some kind of iodine/shellfish mixture that would render the images of the CT Scan easier to read by adding dark/light areas(?) by nature of the contrast mixture. As you lay on the table just prior to your insertion into the 8 foot tall doughnut of the CT Scanner, they come over the speaker (Oh that's right, CT Scans are radioactive so the crew is behind glass in a very NASA like environment while you lay there with the full and complete protection of those beautiful and stylish blue and white hospital gowns) and tell you "Mr Campbell, we are going to start your IV now. You are going to feel warm and will have a sensation like you may have just peed your pants"

Peed your pa......Whoaaaaaaa!!!! I'll say there's a sensation! It just started in my upper chest and neck and went right down my spine in seconds, and yep, it feels like you peed your pants! Just as soon as it rushed over me, it was gone.

Hmmmmmm. MRI's weren't all that bad. CT Scans, at least without IVs, weren't all that bad. I guess I'm doing alright so far...

Kim's research had brought her to Dr. Rodney Landreneau. He was a thorasic surgeon specializing in oncology. He was also listed as a Professor of Surgery as well. Whatever listing guidelines they used to determine such things had him at #3 in the nation. He would be my "primary" Dr. through this. He was schooled in Dallas, doing his Surgery Internship at Parkland Memorial Hospital in Dallas.

....Have I mentioned that I am one of the biggest Grassy Knollers alive today? I have watched 2 and a half years of JFK Assassination shows, read 2,134,344 articles, and 11,239 books on the Kennedy Assassination. My surgeon undoubtedly had worked in the same ERs that had handled our wounded President. Can this be true???

Dr. Chan, head of UPMC's radiology department would be my radiologist and Dr. Osborne would be my Oncologist, another eminent name at UPMC.

Wow. These were some heavy hitters. Hey Toto, we're not in Ellwood City General Hospital anymore...

July 15th finally came and Kim and I set out to make my 9:00 appt. I was told that I would have an EKG, a blood test (Did I mention I hate needles?), and a chest xray. I was going to meet with "My team" as well, so I should expect 4-5 hours......lunch is available in the cafeteria or the Deli.....

Passavant is a very good sized medical facility, hundreds of beds, very intense and complete diagnostic centers, and of course, the Cancer Center. We registered on the main floor and were told to take the elevator down to the Ground Floor.

The elevator doors opened and I was greeted by a wall sized sign "Welcome to the UPMC Cancer Center".
That was a cold splash of reality in my face. I signed in with the extremely friendly staff at the main desk and was asked to have a seat down the hall and our "team" would be meeting with us shortly.

Our waiting area was just outside of the Radiology department. During the 20-30 minutes we were sitting there, we watched outpatients come in for their treatments. They looked like you and me. Nothing like the Hiroshima victims I expected to see thanks to my mind's eye. Thank God for small favors1

Around the corner came Maria, she was Dr. Landreneau's Physician's Assistant. She introduced herself and invited us into a private exam room in the hall. She went on to explain that I was going to meet with all of the Doctor's Assistants today, and then with the Drs. They would review the CT and MRI DVDs I have brought with me. They would consult with each other and spell out a general gameplan of my treatment. The tests I would go thru today were preliminaries to the diagnostic tests I would face in the next week. She then did some vital signs, weight, blood pressure, and the 12 page medical history paperwork. Once that was done we were left alone. Maria had told us that Dr. Landreneau may be delayed as he was in surgery so we may meet with other team members first.

Kim and I looked at each other. We both just said "Wow" with our eyes. This was going to be medical care unlike anything we had ever been part of in our lives.

Second would be a PET Scan. That stands for positron emission tomography. I would get an IV (did I mention I hate needles?) that had a high radiation/short half life glucose liquid. Cancer tumors have a high metabolic rate and would absorb the sugar, along with the radioactive marker. That would then show where the tumor was and if it had spread.

Third would be two "scope" procedures. This meant I would be nighty nite, something I always cherish.

NOTE: The Mark Campbell definition of "Relative Medical Procedures" or RMP states that the chance of you receiving sedation for any given medical procedure is directly inverse to how upsetting the procedure sounds...SEE ALSO: "you may experience some pressure".

These would be a Bronchospomy and a Mediastinoscopy. You get an incision and a scope is inserted to check bronchial areas and then the Media one looks at your windpipe area. (Very basic descriptions of something you sleep through) these would also look for any other tumor growth or issues.

While I am sleeping through these, what a perfect time to put in a Hickman Port.

A who?

This is a little plumbing fixture they place into a blood vessel, about the size of a quarter, that will sit just under your skin, in my case just about on my right collar bone. These are used to allow an IV line(did I mention I hate needles)to be placed into the port with virtually no pain (see RMP above) when you go for chemo or any other time an IV is needed.

Well now, this has been a lot to think about so far...

Enter Dr. Landreneau...

He looks to be of that awkward age...maybe forty, maybe fifty. His light hair confuses the issue, but he looks to be in great shape, as much as you can tell of someone in surgical scrubs. He greets us with a strong handshake, a warm smile, and just the slightest hint of a bayou-ish accent that would come from his Louisiana background.

First thing he says is "Mark, for the next six months all I want you to do is concentrate on getting better. I am going to go in and get that tumor out of your lung. We're going to leave behind a small piece of mesh that has tiny radioactive seeds in it that will kill any remaining cancer cells. Normally we would do this first, but in your case I would favor we do some chemo along with some radiation because of where your tumor is. It's right at an artery and a nerve. the chemo and the radiation will shrink the tumor's size. (at this point the MRI had shown it to be 2cm X 4cm, or about 3/4 of an inch by an inch and a half..about the size of my thumb to the first knuckle) It's touching the nerve is what is going to save your life. If you would not have had that pain in your shoulder, the tumor could have spread to a point that nothing could be done. But for now, let's get these tests done that Kim was telling you about so we know what we are dealing with. I know this is so much to absorb but can I answer any question?"

I was glad he was going to let me ask questions. I wanted to know about chemo since that looked like it was going to be sooner than later. I started to tell him about how my first Father in Law had died on day three of chemo back in 1979....

"STOP RIGHT THERE MARK!!!" He actually looked like he was angered a bit. "Do you have any idea how much these treatments and this science changes month to month? You just can't even THINK about something from 30 years ago! Chemo was in its infancy back then and you don't really know your Father in Law's condition. That was black magic back then. And something else, I want you to stay off the damn internet!!! You will only scare yourself because there are only two kind of stories on there...bad and worse. Most importantly, everyone's different. When you have questions, bring them to me, or to Maria, or anyone else on your team. We are the people that will get to know you and your individual case and circumstances. What happened to Aunt Phyllis or Uncle Bob just does not apply to you! We're going to get that out of you and cure you. You just have to help and work along the way."

Gulp!

He sounds more like a superhero to me than a doctor.

So I had to ask him......

"Dr., my wife Kim did some research online of your bio and it said you interned at Parkland Hospital." A smile started to come up on his face..."Would you have been there when some of Kennedy's Dr.s were there?"

"Oh my Mark, we're gonna have to talk! I studied under all of them! There's so much more to what happened in that Trauma Room than people know! And then there's the Oswald New Orleans connection!! I grew up there and lived thru the Garrison stuff..."

On and on he went recommending books and teasing me with tidbits. He promised me that we would talk throughout all of this and it would be great fun comparing notes....

Next: Did I mention I hated needles?

Kim and I arrived and registered with the Imaging Department and we were taken to a small unit with the now common glass enclosed rooms where you can change, lay in bed, get IVs (gulp). A couple of nurses and technologists came in, took vitals, ask me for my birthday (a new ID verification emphasis) and had me slip on the omnipresent cotton blue and white hospital straight jacket gown. An IV for me this time was going to be some king of contrast fluid that would help highlight the tumor area.

It was explained to me that I was going to go into an imaging room with a CT scanner that would be used to pinpoint the location of the tumor so they can number 1, do the needle biopsy, and 2, mark it for future reference when it came time for radiation if it was to be needed. Besides a little sedation in my IV, they were going to give me novacaine in my shoulder as well.

So, in I went to the CT room and I laid down face first on the table. I was introduced to the very nice woman that was going to be doing the procedure. She went over the procedure again and assured me that it was not going to be as bad as it seemed. I quipped "I'm sure you're probably quite used to these by now...forgive me, I'm a newbie..." Kinda broke the tension that was all mine.

So first they introduced the contrast thru th IV an into the CT scanner I went. They stopped the table from moving after a few inches and came in and made some marks on my back. They repeated this three times. Now it was show time.

First came the numbing drug. "Mark, this is going to feel like a big bee sting and then may burn for just a second or too." I just took a breath in and sure enough.......Let's just say she must have grown up around a lot bigger bees than I did! "Okay now, we'll give it a few minutes to work."

The actual needle biopsy seemed much less the deal than I thought it would be. She made three pokes in my shoulder between alignments of the table, the patient and the CT scanner. One time it felt like she may have hit a nerve causing kinda an electric sensation. One of the nurses had been having me hold her fingers and when I involuntarily jerked because of that, she made the suggest that I should maybe get a little more sedation. (God Bless you RN Linda!) She gave my IV port an injection and we started back in a minute or so, and ho pain at all. I asked Linda what she gave me and she smiled and wrote something in my hand. I looked later and saw "Dulaudin (sp)" Yummmm.

The Dr. was then done with me and they had me roll over to make the layout marks on my upper chest, kinda like little tattoos.

Test one done. And you know what? It was the fear of the unknown! But then again it was kinda unsettling when they told me the 20-30 minute procedure was going to be followed by 2 hours of rest and an x ray, "just to be sure that your lung does not collapse.....don't worry it only happens maybe 2 out of 10 times." I rested the two hours, got the x ray, and all was fine.

Test two was the next day, Tuesday. This was going to be the PET Scan. This was another IV but quite the special one. It was the glucose/sugar based dye that was highly radioactive. The technologist explained that it was five to ten times more radioactive that radiation treatments I would get to kill the cancer---but it only had an hour half life compared to months with th treatment version.

The medicine came out of quite the Sci Fi looking little container....cool. He gave me the medicine and told me I had to lay still and quiet for the next forty minutes. He gave me my panic button and left the cubicle as fast as possible.....Hmmmmmmm.

This was just a CT Scan like the others with some fine tuning on marking out the tumor location---over in about 15 minutes. That wasn't too bad.

Wednesday brought the the scope tests and the IV port insertion. Although no medical type had gone over the results of the previous two days, This Sherlock had it pretty well figured what the story was as there's not much sense in an implant for chemo IVs if it wasn't going to be necessary.

This time I went to the surgery unit to get prepped. The bronchoscopy was going to be a small incision just below my Adams Apple and they would put some kind of optic into bronchial areas of my lung to see if the tumor had gone there. The Mediastinoscopy was a scope to look at my airway/sternum area. The Hickman Power Port was going in just under th skin on my right side of my upper chest.

All of this was going to be under general anesthesia. Sleepy Bye Y'all----Happy Birthday to Me!!!

Prep for this was much like day one, except this time I was getting real drugs in my IV before I left my little glass fish bowl. I looked up at Kim when it was time to go to surgery and I told her I loved her and couldn't wait til we were on our way home after this 45 minute procedure. Off I went across the hall into an operating suite. I had a brief remembrance of seeing Dr. Landreneau and being told that I did not have to help them get me onto the table. Then nothingness.